Making Decisions is Controllable

Yesterday's question from NaBloPoMo was "Do you make up your mind, or do you think making up our minds is outside our control?"

Making up my mind is something I've struggled with a lot, now and in the past (though I think I've gotten a little better). I've tended to be indecisive. A lot of it in the past has to do with my being open to other people's ideas and thoughts, but I often had put their opinions above my own and then lost my own opinion. It also has come from thinking too much. Additionally, I think it came from having too many options or the fear of a decision being permanent.

To be happy, though, I think decisiveness is important and making up one's mind is entirely controllable. Second-guessing might not be as controllable, but it's entirely possible to decide. With some decisions, it's possible to revisit the initial decision. With others, the outcome can be used to determine how to handle decision-making in the future.

A decision that really concerned me over the past few years was choosing a kindergarten for Andrew. I did all of the Catholic school research (monetary/service costs, positives and negatives of the schools, possible financial aid, current sibling discounts) and then Chris and I went to four open houses. I also had tried calling the public elementary school to at least get in and see the environment, but they weren't very cooperative (and the school was planning to be and is now mostly demolished and being renovated; I think it will be ready for fall 2016 when Lucy is old enough for kindergarten). I read a lot about homeschooling (which a lot of my friends are considering and a lot of mothers at my church do) and saw so many positives in it. Something that finally struck me after a lot of blog reading about school choice, was that the decision didn't ultimately have to be a permanent choice. We could choose it for a year, but then we could reassess our decision in the future. It didn't have to be an 8 (or more because of successive children) year decision.

While this isn't true of all decisions, like marriage (which is why it involves dating, engagement, hopefully prayer, and marriage preparation classes), it's certainly true for some of them. In itself, for most decisions, that's a reassurance.